13.58pm

Im free

Im home

Im content

Happy new year's eve

+==edit==+

15.27pm

Who wouldve thought i'd be spending my nye alone at home watching football

But also watching football always reminds me... how much better watching wrestling is hhahahah I shall go down that hole right after this

+==edit==+

20.11pm

Have done nothing and almost forgot it's a new year tomorrow

+==edit==+

20.25pm

This year like all others has been both long and short 

If I didn't blog or take pics I wouldve not even remembered that Anugerah happened this year

Feels like the year just began in August after my 3 months of rut and rock bottom

Thankfully, im ending the year in a much lighter position.

Some of the most significant, memorable moments of the year in no particular order

1. Anugerah was a yolo thing but wew, such a big deal for me to bring hmx's name public

2. Lut Alfie and Fahri Qaizer entering our lives ♡ HUGE huge happiness

3. Lost both Atok and Tok Noh a few weeks apart. That sucked, but it brought the family extra close together.

4. Anga got married, I now have a sister in law and a niece, too!

5. That may-august rock bottom period where I did absolutely nothing for 2 weeks and then picked myself up slowly going on new adventures, being in sentosa every other day

6. Me going hiking every week sometimes twice a week to try and get out of the rut- became such a fun routine but once im out of the rut I somehow stopped hiking, too

7. Working. April-Sep was work from home haven, I had all the free time in the world and could go on so many adventures. But then back to office was actually hellish for me. I am not a morning person, I am not a time waster, it's torture and im so happy im free from it. (For now im gonna say forever cause must think of happy things and not the fact that the new contract will come to me on 3rd jan ugh I havent even seen it yet and I already wanna rip it to pieces yes even though it's a soft copy)

8. Speaking of working, dropping out of Uni. Man the weirdest yoloest decision I made this year. Truly let go and let god for this one. 

9. Speaking of Uni, had my last semester as active HMX member this year. Leaving was quite easy because it barely feels like home anymore. But it just goes to show home is the people you're with. It's truly a totally new generation and I wish them luck.

10. Oh my gosh I almost forgot, the whole Vertigo episode. Worst moment ever. Also first time in A&E which did Nothing at all.

11. Turned 25. 25 is old wtheck but also young. But to me is old cause ew but alhamdulillah

I have a newfound sense of motivation, and the new year seems to be the perfect place to start although I didnt plan it

Ok bye take a break from blogging can you tell im an abandoned being haha i dont mind though everyone pls have fun on my behalf thks

+==edit==+

20.41pm

Lol I just scrolled through my gallery to look for baby photos and realised I didnt mention doing Wedding photography

Parked a car for the first time

Be part of an overnight shoot

Haish okie never ending list i'll just add more later (or not) for my own happiness 

05.09am

Im so not myself I cant even track my sleeping schedule

But I have been at ease and not exhausted or anything so I know i'm okay rested

+==edit==+

21.16pm

Rewatching the sg-indo match and hahaha so funny how they sing national anthems before the match like I get it but still funny lol like compulsory karaoke session or breathing warmup idk so funny

17.37pm

How is alex ferguson 80.

How.

And why am I watching Aquaman willingly

Is that green goblin in the movie

And ed warren

Nothing makes sense between xmas and new year

Hahahahaha

07.31am

Work? 

Especially after such a fun weekend?

It's a no from me

But it's ok I literally only have 2.5 more days of work potentially ever at this office if I still refuse to sign the contract lolol

(2.5.... or 1.5 hehehehehe lol but for valid reason okay settling chiqy's school stuff I forgot which day i'll be on leave)

+==edit==+

11.42am

Oof first day of period today and I feel the weak

My period is very regular but also every few months it changes which week of the month it is, like a reset 

So like the last period I had was 6 weeks ago which resets it to last week of the month again, and after this it will be exactly 4 weeks from each other until the next reset point (my last reset point was April) 

I say this cause it feels like so long since I got my period so it feels weird yet relieving to feel the tired 

Just generally low energy and will take my own time but all is good my peace and happiness comes first muehehe

It's lunchtime but I have no appetite also not that hungry so im just loitering and resting (after typing this I feel slightly hungry pls but nah not gonna move)

21.53pm

Wow I didnt blog on xmas day

Had a lovely weekend, from sushi on a friday afternoon to two beach days in a row

Right now im sleepy which is amazing thanks to swimming at the sea and screaming our heads off hahhaha

ALFIE CAN CRAWL i am shook

I shall share my weekend tomorrow in the office when im inevitably bored

Also im so tired I thought it's past midnight hahaha it's not even 10pm yet

07.43am

What terrible sleep I woke up almost every hour lol but like the feeling when you check the time and you have more time to rest 

The only reason im up and running today is because it's a half day at work

+==edit==+

14.01pm

@ people with crocs; why, how dare you and tell me what is wrong 

Actually you know what, stay away from me hahahaha

(Unless u wear it ironically that one i support)

+==edit==+

15.24pm

Oh me? Just trying not to cry hearing celine dion live performances

What a masterpiece always

Also im so done with circles.life

I think I have tolerated it for more than a year where I pay to get 2 mins of data a day ugh

+==edit==+

18.53pm

Modesty is one of the best features of the Malay culture

These kids lack it in a way that gives me secondhand embarrassment

Who am I to judge

13.58pm

Another day another marvel movie that ripped off kung fu panda

When will this end because nothing slips by me okay 

Anyway had an exciting day yesterday despite horrible (lack of) sleep (more like I keep waking up and then having trouble falling back asleep) and when I was about to fall asleep at 6.30am MOE texted chiqy's school results

Told mama baba and along (cause they were the only ones awake at that time) before going back to sleep and then woke up realising a lot of school prep deadlines is THIS WEEK!

I revealed her school by sending a photo of her in the "uniform" but dramaa cus when she woke up her phone was dead and everyone was waiting on the family chat 

Once revealed, settled some admin things and immediately asked chiqy to get ready for back to school shopping (I was the excited one but she also but she act cool)

Went to bras basah popular (as expected, already plenty of sec 1 parents there buying textbooks)

Weather was so good

We lunched before finding her school bag and stuff and we did it we got everything

All I need to do is order her uniform and school books online... once I can get up

(Sis is on sick leave today, she is exhausted and her whole body feels most achy)

And then walked around bugis village feeling like mini santa 

Headed to vivo for spideyman and made fun of the whole movie because I have ZERO sympathy for him (spiderman, that is) lolol

I was there the whole time thinking about how ridiculous the whole concept is and how it's only "cool" cause high production level and nostalgia (which is a very strong point) 

Definitely weak plot, though

But before you hate on my review, it was Entertaining and I am sure is a dream movie for spiderman fans because I can put myself in their shoes and feel the excitement, suspense and tears (none from me because like i said, NO sympathy whatsoever hashtag come I clap for you and your genius)

I enjoyed the crowd laughing over unfunny things and not laughing when something funny happens so like what are you all on about

Hahah ok la if you like superhero movies you'd definitely enjoy it (I cant appreciate fight scenes, like get to the point already make me dizzy for what I already know who's gonna win anyway)

Also dont get me started about post credit scenes hahaha ok no more hate 

Definitely dont understand why people watch it more than once 

Though I was pleasantly surprised by one of the actors whom ive never seen on screen before this, despite bad reviews on his work I think I like his work??? Lol 

But also, my biggest point of intrigue is the philosophical question about the happiness stimulation.

Not a spoiler dont worry if you care but it's the question of would you agree to be hooked up to an experience machine and experience the greatest happiness you can ever feel and not be aware that it is not reality?

If youve watched the movie I wonder if you can see how the ending poses a similar line of questioning? 

Ok wait since when do I care about not spoiling things you know what im gonna come back and edit this post with proper things let me just get up first

Had then a mini adventure after that while pushing through my exhaustion hehe but it okay today rest day

K bye for now im blabbering but I have another coolish thing to share 

05.33am

Dont get me wrong, this time round me sleeping early and being woken up every few hours is lack of inner peace and not me being a morning bird

Maybe both 

But not fun

+==edit==+

10.58am

Im so excited reading about chiqa's school stuff

She's still sleeping so she doesnt know her fate yet but im already reading about all her curriculum (again)

Lolol also I was planning to reveal her school like a gender reveal HAHAHA 

05.20am

Ohayo 

I do not think since work started I have ever woken up this early but here I am

Fell asleep around 12.30am (wew it was not the easiest I kept waking up when the video I was falling asleep to ends) so I guess 4.5 hours of sleep

Everyday I question myself why I didnt just clear all my leaves lol pfft

+==edit==+

18.23pm

Im home in less than 90 minutes!

Tried a new route which looked longer from the number of bus stops but I wouldve reached home in 1 hour if my 2nd bus didnt take 17 mins to arrive

Yay I survived today

Starving

Most importantly, thinking of my Malaysian friends. ♡

07.37am

OF course the day im on leave my body wakes me up at 7.37am

Cmon

08.25am

Good morning

I kinda loathe it when people who wants to be somewhere early tries to drag me along

As much as you dont like being late, I dont like being early, ESPECIALLY unnecessarily (im 6000% sure I blogged about this exact issue hahahaha u see how it bugs me)

Im an On timer okay if im late it's 83% traffic's fault haha 10% pure laziness and 7% accidentally started putting on makeup when I didnt plan to 

Those are statistics

+==edit==+,

15.28pm

Yesterday I was alone most of the day but this morning healed that emptiness

Went for breakfast with family and then ice cream and spent like an hour rolling around in a carpet shop

Wished we had the whole day together!

But is okie soon

Also I was contemplating attending a live suzuki cup match but the only places left is like indonesia or malaysia hahahahaha hashtag imposter

See if im tired

Happy cause I have mutton soup in my kitchen I want it now

+==edit==+

23.02pm

I know I always "blame" my heart for sadness and pains but my heart is a true rebellious gangster who knows what it wants probably more so than I am aware of

10.39am

Good morningg

Woke up at like 9 today after a restful sleep for whatever reason

Quite happy that work makes me miss vlogmas cause it means I have a lot of things to watch now

Of course im starting with Ballingers they give me so much joy!

Just had breakfast and ready to roll around again

+==edit==+

12.47pm

Just how does Saari Amri do it

How come all the songs he compose become hits for decades

Truly a god given talent i cri

+==edit==+

21.10pm

The rain is making me feel less bad about being the only one home and planless on a satuday night (again, what's new)

04.14am

Pardon me im getting used to being lame again after such a fantabulous weekend

Also im already strugglin and tomorrow is the third and final work day of the week

How can i ever do 5 days in the office the answer youre looking for is never and not in this lifetime

Lolol 

The urge to take half day or mc is strong but mostly cause I didnt have work to do the last 3 hours of work yesterday and foresee it being the same later

Bleh. I should sleep

+==edit==+

13.30pm

On my way to work

Ended up taking half day off but I feel better overall and it feels like a friday so yay about that

Let's do this 4 hours and then find adventures!!! 

+==edit==+

19.18pm

I just wanted to have a good day why is everyone and everything so annoying

And why is the holiday season so crowded

Looks like im sleeping my friday night away again

What a weekend (17.15pm)

I had an amazing weekend but now I am a restful being who is home and sleepy so brb

p.s. this is the most number of days ive not posted wew 

+==edit==+

22.28pm

Thinking of Ayden and Alfie and Ayden and Alfie together and the family and the hotel rooms and the corridors and the 3 days of pure joy

Alhamdulillah for this event, it felt like a family holiday which is major yay

+==edit==+

23.42pm

Did I mention instagram is just stupid because it is

05.51am

Gave myself 2 more hours of sleep but what does my body do

Is fresh and unwilling to sleep

If I start to get sleepy in half hour thats major betrayal but if I stay awake then ok fine I will nap at work lolz

+==edit==+

14.24pm

One of my office windows is left open cause the office is always too cold

And it's raining very lightly outside but the smell of rain is like a candle blowing into the office

Nice

Quite productive today, wasnt too sleepy but got like a 15 mins nap during lunchtime 

Just excited about my 5 days weekend starting in 2 hours

Dance dance

+==edit==+

18.05pm

I keep seeing the matrix poster and thinking it's snape

Lol pfft

00.18am

Very surprised im not crashed yet even though i've been sleepy since 8pm

I think I got too much on my mind and heart but at the same time im actively emptying them all out and taking one thing at a time retaining the good and letting go of bad vibes

+==edit==+

00.45am

Me: plays a long enough vlog so I can fall asleep to it

Also me: ends up paying attention 

Ahaha ok fine true crime it is but like what negative vibes to fall asleep to

Neh probably gonna choose another vlog

Eyes are heavy

+==edit==+

05.40am

Whoa ew i keep waking up every 2 hours

What kind of restless rest is this

+==edit==+

17.17pm

Ended up half day off work aka I came in at 1pm and thank you gojek for having my back I grabbed to work from botanic gardens for 4$

(Just stop being on surge all the time pls)

The amount of times i've replayed e.a.r.l's I just called to say I love you wew astronomical

Obsessed aka we are our biggest fans lol

+==edit==+

18.52pm

Kinda just got home

Went home not tired, not ready to crash and not in a mood

Lol just cause I didnt have to go work at 8am 

01.38am

So blogger updated itself without my permission we'll see if I can finally upload photos

This weekend was beautiful in weird ways

Today I felt extra lonely amidst the crowd so I dragged myself somewhere else, and just like in the movies, a little girl suddenly came up to me and shook her stuffed animal in front of my face

I thanked Allah in that moment for sending me not only company, but the purest form of company, children.

That little girl and her brother befriended me for that 15 minutes, making me forget all about the negative feelings

She introduced me to her stuffed rabbit Jason who wanted to eat candy cane but has no mouth (she still has a lollipop in her mouth thats why she had to hold her candy cane instead of eat it)

My kids club side immediately came out hahah

They cheered me up part 1

And then another being found me and cheered me up part 2 

And then reunited with some old hmx who I missed disturbing, cheered me up part 3

Ate together which made me happy again

And then rehearsearl which always makes me happy

Went home and suddenly had a tummyache- I think it was the super sour sourplum drink I made myself finish despite it being so sour hahaha

Thankful for the people around me

I hope all our affairs are eased, we are blessed with health, wealth, and happiness

May all our good intentions be eased and our dreams and responsibilities be fulfilled to the best of our abilities!

Insyaallah.

Alhamdulillah for this weekend, may it have had recharged me for the upcoming work week (also anga's wedding week!!!!) 

+==edit==+

17.28pm

I just cannot with the universe giving me chances but also testing my will hahaha

Aka my workplace just persuaded me to continue working there by offering not only latecoming but 2 days wfh a week which of course eases half the burden

But i'll still hate the travelling and jobscope and the entertaining people

I just agreed but my heart is upset now that I agreed

But you know what, i'll give myself 3 months

If I still hate it in february, i'll not stay a year (most probably not sis is ready to move on to freelancing life)

But thank you company for finding a middle ground and leeway

Aka the things you get when you are just plain honest

Me: i just cant do mornings

+==edit==+

19.15pm

How does instagram manage to be WORSE every single update.

Wtheck i hate the whole reels thing it's all so messy anf inconvenient and UGLY

Also i havent eaten lunch wew

04.11am

Avoiding youtube cus judy is doing a gender reveal premier
Im simply not ready but either way im just so excited leah is gonna be a sister T.T

+==edit==+
04.13am

Ok yay I went to look for spoilers
It's a GIRL!!!
Benji is officially a dad to 5 girls, thats crazy
Mei lin has 5 siblings and all are girls too
Wew this is the opposite of the ballingers pls hahahaa they are all boys what yin and yang

07.58am

1. What am i doing awake at this time
2. In my dreams my phone was laggy like crazy, now it IS lagging a bit but this is not the kind of dreams that should come true hello

+==edit==+
08.39am

Yes hello
Three seconds after i switched off my standing fan and was peacefully settling down, it fell right beside me, knocking over and spilling a giant bottle of hand sanitizer
That was DANGEROUS cmon the front part came off exposing the blades too
The alcohol almost touched my extension cable and idk how my fan almost fell on me also thankfully I was cold and shut the fan off
So now my pillow and blanket are wetish, I cant fall back asleep cus i dont trust the fan no more, and I am tired but to be fair I did get almost 7 hours of sleep so im probably not that tired

+==edit==+
16.38pm

Everyone is on my nerves
Maybe I should simply stop interacting with people cus right now I dont want to deal with anyone

+==edit==+
18.57pm

Wew my mood is lifted after spending time with family (specifically baby alfie no offence everyone else you all also matter hahahaha)
So yay thank you for the blessing of children

13.55pm

The way I watch kung fu panda 2 and feel so emotional im on the verge of tears at the part where master shifu and ox and croc and the furious 5 leapt into the sky with Po what a goosebumping moment
Yea I dont get the same feeling from superhero movies now those are lame

+==edit==+
21.40pm

Have been feeling lonely this past week (ps im home alone again)
This isnt what being 25 looked like from my younger selves' imagination
Hahhah but it's ok things will be better before I know it
All is good and all will be well
Exciting weekend ahead so thats good
Need a soul recharge and getting some
Did I mention I missed work today
Lol the exhaustion

12.13pm

Omggg im watching Kung fu panda 2 for the 700th time and suddenly got curious about who voices Lord Shen cus his voice so cool
It's freakin Sirius black!!!
Shook factor 4000

And what the heckie doodle do they mean when they say Baby Po is played by an Australian rugby player ape ni merepek I cant even comprehend did he make the baby noises or what??? HAHAHAHA that would be hilarious

+==edit==+
20.04pm

I went from having 13 more dreaded months of work to 17 DAYS (and potentially 9 if I clear my leave but we'll see about that)
But oh my, the thought of having only 9 more days of work puts me in such a holiday mood
Yay me
Here's to bigger and better things

Merry December (00.00am)

What a lonely start to a new month yet final month of the year
I am at the bus stop trying to get home from bedok
My bus still isnt here
My battery is at 23% and I dont feel like listening to any music
I have work in 8 hours
Things will only go uphill from here
Like... I think thats my bus at the traffic light there

+==edit==+
01.34am

I did it
I managed to not grab today except that impossible journey between nus and my workplace
I couldnt take a bus if I tried pls it would be a literal uphill battle
There's something freeing about anticipating freedom, we feel it during last days of schools, but those are bittersweet
This one just feels sweet lol I have finally written down my rejection letter in my phone memo and it already made me happier even though I havent even sent it yet lol
Also happy last day of work to doya!
Im so happy and proud and also may He ease our affairs in doing work that comes from the heart
We got this uncearl
Felt rejuvenated just being there aka earl's rehearsal venue hahaha
Reminder to self: live life making power moves
Lets goo
Ok but first time to try and sleep lol

+==edit==+
11.15am

Did I mention I have a sudden ulcer at the back of my tongue
And I mean SUDDEN
One second i didnt have it and suddenly when I was gonna speak it began developing and it hurts and is uncomfortable and annoying and im too old for this but too young too just go away please
Im ready to send the email
I just wanna talk to dear mei lin first because she has been so patient in teaching me things
It's quite a sorry not sorry feeling
Sorry to mei lin, not sorry to everyone and everything else

+==edit==+
22.31pm

I did it.
Funny thing is I wanted to tell mei lin before I sent the email but she was hit by problem after problem all in one sitting so I kept putting it off and just sent the email after lunch
Suddenly at like 3pm she gasps and said WHAT IS THIS when she read my email that was forwarded to her
But she's a sweetheart so I just told her I wanted to tell her since morning but you kept getting troubled
She was like Ok between u and me tell me the real reason
Me: im just not a morning bird
Her: ohhh okay yup i understand, im a morning bird
And she proceeds to share a story about her old workplace in HK where they actually gave a leeway to the morning birds to start earlier and end earlier and the nocturnals to start later and end later
What a useful system!!!
Wouldve stayed in the job longer if that was the case but alas
Went to lasalle after work and managed to get a ride back thanks to Anga (who assumed it'll be chiqa who wants to be sent home but NOpe she's happy staying there where she has friends) so yay now im lying down and resting
Alhamdulillah for another lovely day, looking forward to a blessed Thursday insyaallah!

05.49am

Oh yes I got my 8 hours of sleep it is a miracle but also frankly time I didnt even get the chance to negotiate or manipulate because of how tired I get after work lol
May today be a good day
At least I know I wont be grabbing to work ahahhaa

00.50am

Tired, not even home yet, but the biggest source of my pain is the fact that I have work in 7 hours.
Much eww and cant wait to leave
Sis cant afford to dread every monday lol
This is not a feasible lifestyle
Literally just the thought of how I have 1 more full month until my initial contract makes me eughh
One more month of going to the office?!?!
Heck nah but imma take it day by day like a champ
It'll be less than 25 days because anga's wedding leave, christmas, ok ok ok i got this insyaallah
Here's hoping I crash right as my head hits the pillow and somehow manage to get some quality sleep

+==edit==+
01.32am

Finally home and settled down the fastest ever
At least my eyes are heavy and not in true me fashion aka I suddenly feel awake once I lie down lolz okie got hope I can fall asleep soonish
I think i kinda hurt my thumb it feels sprainished
Wew

+==edit==+
07.14am

Feeling more tired than before I fell asleep ahahaha
But I understand it's 40% mental ofcus the thought that I am going to work is wearing me down even harder I dont even feel like moving

+==edit==+
10.33am

Currently in a corporate talk where they are talking about... wait for it...
SMART goals setting
I literally have heard this every year since 2009
Lolol dont people progress

+==edit==+
19.04pm

Today was okay except the fact that I just reached home do you understand that was a 2 hours journey I cant even
This morning I felt refreshed right as I showered, and then the day went smoothly from there
Very smoothly in fact, I only realised the time when it was almost 4pm
But best part it I was more occupied with bonding than actual work
So yay @ that
Was really tempted to grab back but I took the bus and just the weather is so so beautiful today
Such a beach weather
Alhamdulillah for today
If tomorrow is a repeat i'd be content too
Well except the grabbing to work part lol
But yes now home and definitely lying down after I shower
Yay me
Hungry

+==edit==+
19.56pm

Did I mention we did a 7 hour shoot yesterday and this time round my arms didnt hurt cause im strong but I feel like my right thumb is sprainedish
Why do I feel like I already blogged this
Oh well blog again cus a bit pain hahahaha

22.07pm

Im quite unready to make the sure decision to leave my job
But the universe keeps giving me signs to yolo
And who am I if I dont heed these clear messages

+==edit==+
22.14pm

I love seeing the outside so crowded, it's very lively!
Feels like a weekend
May everyone stay safe and healthy!

06.36am

Oh look who's up very early and alarmless and fresh when she absolutely does not have to be
Im tellin you my physical and subconcious being is giving me a clear message

+==edit==+
12.54pm

Woke up to an empty house
Why everyone got life except me >:(
Ok to be fair I should have been out working but last minute cancellation
But god knows I need this rest- in every aspects honestly

+==edit==+
13.46pm

I am simply put, ruined after listening to the newly released Tinggalkan diriku
The fact that arwah sarah's live showcase rehearsal take can be released as a single is such a testament to her talent
So beautiful and heartwrenching

+==edit==+
17.16pm

Going through social media today is just me realising I have no friends haHhahah

07.16am

Cant remember the last time I had a full night's sleep
So tell me why I still woke up tired and snoozed my alarms (ok i woke up too early so I went back to bed)
But yay, it's friday and it's also a special day because it's our dearest shab's wedding this evening

+==edit==+
08.33am

Access cards are stupid because I forgot mine and now I cant freely roam and get coffee

+==edit==+
12.18pm

Oh im gonna cry!!!
Watching sepahtu reunion and the crowd's reaction when soep entered
True sepahtu reunion happening goosebumps

00.08am

Had a lovely off day
Chiqa got her results and I bought many pretty peel off nail polish colours and finally watched gv episode 1 which made me want to sing so I sang
Back to work later zzz

+==edit==+
19.24pm

Some days positivity should be force fed because it can save
Sometimes like today only being stoic is the answer
I shall not think nor feel
I shall not associate
Im home almost 2.5 hours after work for no good reason
But now im home alone I shall breathe and stop doing things and find peace
I survived today

22.53pm

This giant sigh of relief within me that I got 2 days mc

10.18am

In pain, cold and sleepy
In a very Dont talk to me mood but im taking it slow today
Hoping to go even slower just noone bother me okay
Cant wait for nap time aka lunch time

+==edit==+
17.57pm

Barely survived today but I did because of how passive I was lol
The one day my arms hurt I had to do heavy lifting so like how rude
Currently tethering at the confirmation to leave this office job because I cannot stand working in an office anymore I cannot stand 9 hours of my life (plus 3 hours of travel time to and fro) wasted on something that does not make me happy
Knowing me i'd try and tolerate for a few more months but dear me from me: Leave soon please thank you

+==edit==+
23.14pm

Also the things that are pushing me towards early retirement from office life all happened today:
1) The higher up walked by my table while I was resting my eyes from the screen and asked "What are you doing" and that is offensive is it my fault I do my work really quickly that I can afford to take a break and then he says "Be careful if people come in" (I assume in case other people sees me 'idling') First of all, I do my work well and efficiently. Second of all I dont want to work at a place where the culture is we have to care about what others think and that appearing busy is better than doing nothing
2) I had to do heavy lifting today. I carried about 350 books and now my recovering arms are even more sore than before and it made me realise I am not physically cut out to do this job my strength is for wrestling not book stacking
3) Out of nowhere im being trained to do two people's jobs because they're both leaving BUT my pay will remain the same even though im tanking two people's roles (this is a rich concern coming from someone who never cared about her salary but girl knows her worth lol)

So yes. I think it's fair that the universe is presenting me with these red flags and I urge my innermost self to not see these as something to push through and survive because it's not worth it
But also I was reminded about how when I was on a week mc from vertigo they kept bugging me to check my emails and that was very annoying I couldnt even use facebook if I wanted to and you want me to reply to work emails please
Honestly, the hardest part is not leaving or job security because I am beyond that point- happiness is my priority I will work hard somewhere else
The hardest part is just telling them im not continuing but I have to do it soon so they can start finding someone else who is more willing to be a government slave
Im not it
Peace out
Im hungry

ps honestly if im being selfish I can just leave in 3 months when work will be idle- but they will suffer because the person who can train my replacement would be long gone by then and I wouldnt have learnt enough to train them

01.23am

Right now im a happy camper
Just one rehearsearl hahaha I was waiting to sing the new song for 2 weeks and finally got to hear more than myself + pianos :')
Cant wait for full squad to unite

+==edit==+
15.55pm

Exhausted is not really the word
My entire physical being from my head to my toes hurt im not even exaggerating it feels like I just ended wrestling class but worse
Im not sleepy though I got 2 hours of sleep but my exhaustion also includes dry eyes
I had vertigo this morning for like 2 minutes so that was scary im thankful it didnt persist
But hey, I survived my second ever wedding shoot!
This time as a videographer which was exciting
But yes now im physically zzz
I cant bend my arms cause it's so sore so like typing this makes my arms burn
Alhamdulillah am home, showered, eaten and now that im ready to crash, the rain just started

01.42am

My entire body has been hurting since ive had to go to the office daily lol
The pain is real

+==edit==+
16.31pm

Yo I just looked down to my phone and felt a milisecond of vertigo no way josé u are not allowed to return to my life ever again

07.43am

.... good morning i guess
I should go get ready

+==edit==+
13.18pm

Im on week 5, and idk why dato ac giving motivational words to the new comedians makes me so emOtional
It must mean so much for them to have someone who has shared stages with the best of the bests to applaud and acknowledge your efforts
But also, WELL DESERVED 5 HAs for this crazy group called Bahye
So excited to watch more but also im right on time cause tonight will be a fresh new episode

+==edit==+
13.53pm

Please la Tiro is too impressive wtheck they deserve the many2 HAs theyre getting and Noh is right what a complete package WAIT WHO NEVER GIVE HA their expectations too high now
It feels like sepahtu when every week im like How are they gonna outdo themselves and they just do, every single week
Speaking of I miss jep's nonsense

+==edit==+
14.28pm

Ooh I cant believe I actually caught up and watched the first 5 weeks
I didnt think i'd watch it this year but really not bad ah the contestants so
Excited for tonight's episode!
Otai pls buck up we're all rooting for you azlee is so humble even though he's so legendary

+==edit==+
20.23pm

Another mixed feelinged day
So many things (more like people) annoyed me but also there were pleasant things including finally finding glitter eyeliner
I think the annoyed is mostly exhaustion aka I have less patience but like it's all internal
Waking up before im ready makes me not a good version of me lol
But, giant breath of relief that it's Friday and im finally settled down
Cant wait to play with new makeup, havent had proper food today but im too tired to move to think about food
Okay bye

ps hdb has been on my nerves for YEARS trash muffins

13.32pm

Feels so good to be home on a weekday
I just couldnt wake up this morning lol

+==edit==+
13.59pm

One day eventually my heart will catch up on being okay and light again
Dont tell me I dont give you time to heal ah talk to my hand

+==edit==+
20.29pm

What a day of emotional roller coaster but I only want it to go up from now onwards okay so im reaching out
Want a rehearsearl soonest because I keep listening to our One recording of I just called to say I love you and I need more with more correct notes and tempo lolol
Also did I mention no I didnt I got through suara top 40 again but honestly pulled out cause the compulsory ARTs lol (cus if u miss the free session you have to pay yourself) and schedule doesnt allow
But im also in another random competition with e.a.r.l and we did a green screen recording honestly I dont remember if i blogged all these I feel like I have been such an inactive human and blogger I vlog a lot though (yes, still unedited i tried to edit Melaka 2018 vlog at work but I stopped after making the title lolol)
Well, I remember exactly when it began to feel downhill but my hormones are probably playing tricks on me im okay this is just a down day
So happy to have had the day off from work but at the same time I did nothing so like hahahahaa
It's okay
I was gonna say TGIF but is it even friday tomorrow or is it thursday i lost sense of time sistas
Ok bye would be nice if ballingers dropped a vlog today

ps Happy 13th birthday Farrieal iqim and 12th birthday Farley aqil, i miss you my baby nephews and your entire family T.T i promise to tell yall ghost stories the next time we meet

+==edit==+
23.20pm

Pasttime is writing my own stories with all the possible heartbreaking scenarios so that if any happens to me (please no) i'm semi prepared because reading my own works hurt me hahaha

00.57am

I was sleepy and ready to sleep again like an hour ago but I did these things called eat and drink coffee so I might have woken my internal system up
Also about yesterday, I managed to turn my day around just by not caring and being more present and purposeful
Instead of fuming I started a conversation with the grab uncle (who again I might add was kind enough to advise the non-erp route)
And the day turned out positive despite reaching the office 10 mins late (which is so lame like work is 9 hours so I can be 10 mins late pfft people take smoke breaks longer than that ahahah)
(but also my manager and colleagues are all chill anyway so thats a plus so all was good except.... the 22$ i had to spend oof heart pain)
Lunch was great mama packed me lunch but I didnt have enough hydration cus I didnt have coins and I dont drink water hahahahaha lol so I drank 3 cups of hot drinks but didnt even finish them
I was fresh though like didnt even nap during lunchtime!!! (Thank you MLM for accompanying me, I miss the OGs but it's so nice to see familiar faces and new ones too ok la all nice la)
Thought of all kinds of adventures I could do after work but ended up grabbing back because suddenly got tired at the last hour (I reached home in 15 MINUTES I was elated) and found out my period just came so no wonder the sudden tiredness
MmmMm okay I just looked through chiqy's secondary school selection booklet and saw that CHR no longer offers Higher Malay!!!! (And no malay dance, but beautiful to see choir is thriving thank you to papa liew and my batch hahahah)
Our legacies wew
I wanna go back some day and walk the corridors
Im very fond of that place
Ok no time for emotional tonight I should attempt to rest (or maybe not, maybe I will sleep at 6am and get a 20 mins nap again, we'll see)

+==edit==+
07.30am

You know how they say while attempting lucid dreaming you test when youre dreaming by trying to read something cause it wont make sense
That doesnt happen to me lol I dreamt I was writing a script and the main character girl was a secret shark prophetlike figure hahahahaha lolol
Also yea im here cause I am exhausted and also failed the no grab challenge this morning
(Also im hearing chiqa wanting to skip last day of pri school I WOULD NEVER HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT IT my pri school experience was so fun and I have friends and teachers I love) (but mama is convincing her to go even though school started 15 mins ago and she's still in her pyjamas but like I agree GO LITTLE ONE)
For the past few work days i've always woken up before or when my alarm rings at 6.38am, but I snooze and then I have never been able to wake up before 7.20am which is just a tad too late because my bus comes at 7.35am like if I had woken up 5 mins earlier I couldve rushed but not even
Isnt it annoying that if I caught that bus I wouldve been actually Early to work just by waking up 5 mins earlier but my body just dont bend to time that way and I dont blame it I understand you are a victim of capitalism hahahahaa ok tiba2
Me last night: Oo I should play with makeup in the morning
Me now: Like I ever will
Lol ok fine i'll get ready now

+==edit==+
09.19am

All is well
Also I never realised how impressive Zero is I mean ive always liked them but they feel so natural it felt effortless until this season's MLM when they split into 2 groups and both groups are doing so well
What a cute community
Also im happy daniel got to team up with 2/3 of zero cause he's so talented and this group spurs him on and helps him grow
I miss the jozan jambu sepahtu shiro and syjs but the newbies are doing not bad at all

+==edit==+
22.42pm

Whoa I slept 3 hours tonight like 7-10pm
Also how annoying that both my wifi and 4g are lagging right now

00.00am

Pls I was just gonna add another edit to the last post but the clock struck midnight ahaha
Just wanted to say that I miss being Available for anyone and anything pre-office hours
Cant wait to get that freedom back
For now i'll hang on and do my best and complain when necessary
But yea I miss being free on weekdays and down for any projects and if anyone needs helps or company
I will make sure I gain that ability again insyaallah

+==edit==+
08.08am

Woke up earlier than yesterday
Was gonna leave earlier than yesterday
And I was like okay good today is the day more people will be in the office anyway so great to be early
But freakin grab crashing on us and ryde giving me a driver 15 mins away and my only hope is gojek with freaking exuberant prices
Tuesday you were supposed to be better
I am disapOINTED
I need with all my heart for my driver to be a fast one if im paying 22 for not I will just not do anything
Ok he is nice to help me avoid 4$ erp (also why are u this way government, ripping us off this way) but I will definitely be very late so
Im just gonna pretend nothing is happening
I dont exist

+==edit==+
08.22am

So what is this situation I should have just took an mc it costs half the price and none of the stress of pleasing anyone and being upset over the innocent driver uncle's friendliness and slowness in driving
Pls la

+==edit==+
08.43am

Ok fine I decided to live in the moment and not be upset over the reality that i'll be what, 10 mins late lol
So okay I am ok now in the office and beginning to freeze
Here's to a better day,
I... cant wait to not do this

+==edit==+
20.21pm

Crashed the past 2 hours lol

08.07am

Woke up like 15 mins ago and only had a 1 second thought of I should just take MC but I just got up and got ready and now despite the crazy monday morning grab fares im on my way to work and insyaallah will be on time
Sounds like the start of a good week to me insyaallah I hope hope and will make make it too

+==edit==+
11.53am

But why does opening bottles hurt my hand

+==edit==+
12.44pm

Today im happy because the office isnt freezing ahaha

+==edit==+
23.53pm

Alhamdulillah today was pleasant
Wasnt happy happy but at ease and smiled so thats amazing
Work went okay, I was occupied so time passed quite quickly
Got ice cream right after work, :)
Went home to fetch chiqy before heading to nenek's place where I crashed and napped for an hour while chiqa babysat our turtles Chicken, Nugget, French and Fries (she named them)
Also, Happy 30th birthday to Anga (last birthday as a single man!!!) And 22nd birthday to Ele, aka the fat twinz!!!
May you both always be blessed with health, wealth and happiness, achieve success, and have a better year than the last ♡♡

12.14pm

The cold weather simply puts me in a foul mood
Lol is this what yall feel when it's hot and you're all angsty
Cus same but not same especially when the cold is manmade like WHY do u need the fan so strong and aircon so cold

+==edit==+
23.57pm

The pms emotional heaviness is real and I hate it but I guess the fact that im aware makes it better but like deep down inside I still feel sad for no reason
Zzz it's ok because when im sad I always have ballinger family to accompany me
...another office day ahead
Ive never dreaded mondays but like.. office

02.19am

What I thought could have potentially be an adventurous friday night became just another weeknight aka me sleeping right as I get home
Only difference is I bought new contacts but the colours I wanted were not in stock so like zz but it's ok
Here's to a wonderful weekend
But right now, I just feel like watching vlogs of baby duncan so dont mind me

04.15am

If I were a typical homosapien who sleeps at night time I would have slept through this cold cosy night
But alas
But, actually, I slept from like 9pm-2am so that was an impressive feat it's probably the longest consecutive sleep I got since I had to face office hours
Just watched vlogs of colleen's twins birthing experience and Bailey's birthday vlog and it make me miss gatherings
Just random picnics or chalets or house visits where all the kids will be busy doing our own thing while the adults talk and laugh and the only time we are disturbed and pulled away from our games or storytelling is to eat and eat
Recover soon, world ♡

Also yea yesterday was another did-nothing at work day which again im not complaining but being in the office to do nothing is not fun
A bit (actually the thing that's bugging me the most currently) annoyed that I have a video to (re)edit from scratch especially since I dont have my laptop with me and if you do things you'll know how important using a familiar device is zz

+==edit==+
08.16am

I dont get it
Why do I still have to get ready and travel in this cold

+==edit==+
17.47pm

Um why is the first taylor swift song i gave chance to by not skipping when it appears in shuffle during tis Heartbreak Season TM making me crai i allowed it cus upbeat but how the lyrics so accurate pls lol
U have talent and curse

+==edit==+
18.16pm

It's simple, really
People do what they want

+==edit==+
19.18pm

Truly the only way to survive others' cruelty is to only see their good
If not we're doomed to a life of solitude
Also the only day I have energy and mood to go out and do adventures I have no friends
Whats new

17.32pm

The way my soul lights up when I get to grab home and be home in 18 mins instead of taking the bus and taking 90-120 minutes
Alhamdulillah
Also, the TGIF feeling is very real this dreary week
And baba visited me at the office for a bit and dropped sugared doughnuts
And now im outttt and I have a life because im going to A MALL on a weekday

+==edit==+
20.54pm

The way I confidently thought today is friday cause I had a semblance of a life
Hahaha

01.21am

Have been replaying our I just called to say I love you recording on repeat and I mean REpeat
Also it's very alarm material I will probably change it soon ahaha
Only slept 2 hours earlier tonight, so probably will sleep again around 4 or 5
Im hungry right now
Also chiqatito's graduation is today D;
How is she done with primary school I cri
So far every school year of her life I managed to send her off for her first day so thats a sister win for me
Not ready for sec school- but we did fine she'll do great too; it was truly the most memorable and impressionable part of life thus far

+==edit==+
07.48am

Another morning of waking up feeling meh about the day's activity aka how is it only wednesday I have only went to the office TWICE in a row and I feel miserable already lol

+==edit==+
19.16pm

Today was trippy because I basically slept 80% of the time at the office because there was nothing to do
So I was tortured in the cold and kept falling asleep, like legitimately REM sleeps I even dreamt about the office hahaha
Like I slept through the morning after watching chiqy's graduation livestream (while eating biscuits dipped in coffee), and lunchtime I just lay down and slept the whole hour, and then I thought that ought to make me fresh enough to stay awake but no I fell asleep again at 3pm
And then spent the remaining 1.5 hours clearing my email
Couldve done nothing at home and saved the grab and ezlink money and the unnecessary peak hour crowd zzz but whatevs
I thought Oh good since I slept the workday away i'd finally go home not tired!!!
But travelling was tiring too so yes im in bed relieved to be able to lie down properly

00.24am

The way I just knocked out for 3 hours straight shortly after reaching home from work
Office hours and I are not friends, she thinks we are but I say NO
But it's ok because I choose to make my time worthwhile
Aiming to take the bus tomorrow morning but like who knows what time i'll fall asleep tonight hahahaa
Ok im hungry

+==edit==+
02.02am

Whenever I feel down in the dumps like this watching ballinger family vlogs make me feel better ahaah thank u

+==edit==+
04.26am

Feels like 4 hours have passed but it's only been 2 ahaha
Anyway @ all the adults ever who tells me to "just sleep and wake up earlier" u dont know me okay also you had decades to have a body clock and also if this were stone ages you'd have needed me to guard the caves at night for YOUR OWN LIVES okay also I fall asleep when you wake up mostly not by choice im just born this way lady gaga said so too
Aka this is me looking at the time and going "again?" knowing full well what will happen in the next few hours aka I will get almost 2 hours of sleep so I snooze my alarm to get another hour in with the tradeoff of having to grab instead of taking the bus
But like I said, I will try to bus today
My eyes are kinda heavy right now
Also last night I knocked out at about 3am so that was a miracle (maybe cause I came back from aca stuff and it is productive tiredness and im happy and at ease hahahahaha)

+==edit==+
04.53am

Also why is it that I can put on henna on my right hand using my left hand and do it well but not nail polish
Shouldnt 3 strokes be easier lolz maybe cus too small
Im also considering not sleeping anymore and just nap during lunchtime
Seems like a plausible option
Also catching up on judy's vlogs makes me happy too
Their vow renewal was so heartwarming

+==edit==+
07.34am

She's at the BUS STOP awaiting her bus
She got 20 mins of power nap and feels quite energetic for now
And she has lunch packed thanks to mama
Good job

+==edit==+
19.03pm

I dont think there will be a day I wont be unhappy about going to the office the travelling itself makes me defeated and exhausted I cant afford to fall asleep right upon reaching home this is gross I need to find a nearer job to me

03.04am

Had a real lovely and exciting and heartwarming Sunday
It both fuels and reminds me how boring going back into office is (aka yes I have to go back to the office later aka why am I awake)
Gonna try and sleep hopefully I fall asleep by 330 aka before 4

+==edit==+
11.08am

What an unpeaceful morning thus far
Dk what route my grab driver took just now but I was too tired to care
People bugging me over things I do not care about in the slightest
Getting news that i'll have to come to the office daily for now
LeAvE me aLone everyone i will litrally disappear i have no regrets and obligations
Now im freezing and hungry so like Turn around already okay Monday

+==edit==+
16.35pm

Okayy the day did turn around kinda
Got an hour nap after lunch, it's somehow not as freezing now, done with so many work and got some good news
Although I have to give props to my strong ability to ignore whatever doesnt give me happiness

05.06am

Had a lazy saturday, ate so much snacks hahahaha
Excited for today, no idea what we're doing but just happy to reunite
Also excuse to dress up ahaha

+==edit==+
07.45am

Why am I not sleepy and why am I watching teded about why we get fevers i dont have a fever but fun factz

08.12am

Just got home from my first experience of an overnight shoot
It was so fun!!!
Granted I didnt do any work for the last 7 hours of the shoot but it was a nice feeling to be part of the production
We started filming at about 9pm and wrapped around 6am, so like anti office hours lolol
All went well alhamdulillah and I drove an auto car for the very first time too
I wanted to move the car from one slot to another
Ive driven before but ive never parked a car ever in my life but my brain says Meh how hard could this be
I did it but like what a crazy I didnt even figure out how to use the car I just switched on the engine and went for it (which afterwards I googled I totally didnt do it right aka have to step on brake pedal before changing gears I did none of those)
Yeah I was shook when the car started crawling by itself but I got it and I did it so what a superhero
Litrally while reversing a car was going to go straight so I pretended I know what I was doing and I dont think they could tell im not a driver ahahaha
But then I lost confidence when suddenly I couldnt reverse anymore (when I tried again to readjust after already parking) so titi the girl with actual license helped finish the job ahahaha
All in all, spirits were all good, weather was cool the whole night alhamdulillah we didnt need any fans nor jackets!
Okay I guess time to rest ahaha but I got some sunshine so im a bit charged

+==edit==+
18.23pm

Yall need to be EDUCATED a cappella is not 1 lead singer and all unnecessary voices without everyone it is no song it is just bathroom singing cmon man

23.52pm

Before the day ends, happiest birthday to the nerdiest person
Just wrapped ele's day 1 of shoot
Onwards to day 2!

02.09am

Kay have been attempting to fall asleep the past 3 hours but of course im not succeeding I already knew it wont happen but I tried not really but still
Have to go back to the office later so gotta get up in 4.5 hours

+==edit==+
07.17am

..... why mei lin, why u gotta ask me to the office today I am a night owl who is not productive in societal timeline of office hours
But actually I always drama ah with social interaction I fake proper restedness but when im alone... zz just wanna not

+==edit==+
11.17pm

How is it only 11am..... dont feel good at all cause wore specs the whole morning
Trying to rest my eyes before I change to contacts again
The dizziness is real bluek
Also out of nowhere my MI history teacher is currently in my bookshop browsing through books hhahahahaha glad to know he's still doing history
I said hi and he was shook
Ahahaha okie my coffee is too hot and my brain hurts

+==edit==+
18.58pm

Wah the amount of time it takes for me to reach home is not okay

01.09am

Baby chiqa cooking fried rice at this timing is correct

+==edit==+
02.57am

My office hours is just 1am-whatever time I complete task for the day and today I ended in an hour so that is excellent
Chiqo's fried rice is superb
I miss going on adventures I feel like I havent fully recovered emotionally, spiritually and physically from the last two weeks of October
I feel at ease, sure but like I dont feel fully myself
The fire did spark for a few moments while I was showering cause I was reading some quotes I resonated with
But after that it went away ahaha but at least I know where to respark myself when I feel like it
This is what I would say it feels like when people say Whatever is in retrograde ahahahah
But I also think I know one of the reasons why, and once this reason is removed i'll be doing so many fun thingzzz hehe so it's okay I will be patient and tide this out insyaallah

+==edit==+
14.22pm

"For once don't look at it rationally"
- Alsu Gara

This is what many people fail to do at times
When man is showing their roughest most genuine emotions is when they find it best to bring up truths, and morals, and should haves and should bes.
Sometimes we just have to let emotions be raw and look at it from a human point of view.
Times like that your rationality helps noone
As much as it is reflex to ground each other,
Sometimes it's okay to just let it be

Merry November (00.20am)

Be right back

+==edit==+
01.38am

Ive been such a bad blogger
Have to remove my makeup
Have to do work before morning because I dont want to do work in the morning
Have to nap because im a bit tired
But doing none of those lol

+==edit==+
04.51am

Yes now I am free to rest since I have removed my makeup and done work
Today my diet consists of 3 breads
So no wonder im kinda hungry now ahahaah but nope I choose lazing around over finding food anyway im only like 40% hungry so not enough

+==edit==+
16.40pm

Cant wait until I can sing sad songs again without feeling anything
For now every song is a turn off lol
A cappella easier cause im focusing on my part and the fun more than the lyrics

+==edit==+
20.19pm

Just got strength from a realisation that jealousy and hurt is merely a worldly feeling
If it is merely a worldly feeling, why would I feed into this peasantness
I am better than that and of course sometimes the feeling will come visit but my role is to swish them away as quickly as it comes
They are but temporary, and a disturbance, and not worth my attention

+==edit==+
22.04pm

Chiqa asked me for some of her quotes that I have in my memo and now im stuck laughing to myself rereading all the nonsense (mostly provided by hmx)
I started this whole quote writing in sec school when i realised mr chai says so many funny things I wanna remember them and now it's my best entertainment litrally laughing so hard right now

18.00pm

Seriously dont need negativity especially when it comes to my craft
I want risks, I want free fall and I want yolo to the max

05.02am

Me still not crashing at a peasant human time after days of 1 houred sleeps
Good stamina

05.00am

Always the most unsleepable on nights I have a wakeup time set
Sadly gotta go back to the office in 3 hours time
Hopefully it's nothing too brain consuming cause im exhausted

+==edit==+
15.05pm

Surviving well
Just when I felt like just falling onto the floor mei lin decided to give us a break ahahah thank you
How did I not bring my charger!!! Im so mad litrally brought it in the same bag yesterday without using it and then I took it out overnight

01.48am

Okay at 11.59pm I was gonna blog but it turned midnight already so
Had a bittersweet day yesterday
Started the morning with the burial of Tok Noh, may he be placed amongst the righteous.
It feels surreal, I guess it will always be.
Thank you for all the light and liveliness you've given the family, you'll never be forgotten tok noh and we will keep you alive with stories about your antics and taglines. (And how he calls our names, shasha ika yana are all shashas, im uni, and yes many more variations of names and even song lyrics hahaha)
Al-Fatihah
Mohd Noh bin Idris
4th January 1961-24th October 2021

Went to nenek's house afterwards to eat and mingle, baby Alfie is just too much he always looks so focused when we sing with hand movements
Napped for what I hoped was 2 hours but was actually 20 mins before playing a random telegram game with cena ele and chiqa, it was fun hahaha but I had to get ready for Safiah's wedding at night
Thankfully nenek has baju kurung I could wear, kak su had makeup and heels and thus I was set (well except my shiny bagpack lol)
Headed to katong for the event and it was soo lovely to catchup with shabs and syuh (the new mummy!!!), wished asyraf and mima were there too
Walked to parkway parade with 10% battery
A gojek uncle (who enjoys philosophy and music too!) accompanied me while I wait for human before heading to the beach- thankfully my phone lasted until we met
The beach was quite lively for a Monday night!
I had a really pleasant time

Today I tried A&W for the first time since it reopened in SG
The portion of the coney dog + curly fries + root beer was just nice to make me perfectly full!

Um, I have to reach someplace in 7 hours
Shall set my alarm and attempt to fall asleep
My eyes are quite tired but we all know that means nothing
Hahaha okay
Goodnight

ps Note to self; always choose positive feelings

01.49am

Just realised that I dont remember my MI GP teacher's name
I can literally remember full names of my primary schoolmates and birthdates of people I dont talk to but such a recentish fact I dont remember
Oh well just shows how little MI meant to me lol (only good thing was MCS aka abang mok)

Im at a point where yes I have devastating news to share but I havent processed it yet
Tok noh is gone.
Covid, too.
It warms my heart that he will be amongst Allah's loved ones, perfect and at peace and free, but I am so so sad that none of us, especially nenek who probably meant the world to him, got to see him recently
I have a lot of memories of and with him, and I want to document it all but like I said,
havent even slightly processed it
In the morning it would be different
In the morning we'll head to the procession and reality might sink in
May He grant nenek and the rest of the family strength and peace- she lost two of her closest people within 10 days apart of each other

04.46am

A struggle when my brain is awake and fresh but my eyes are tired and heavy
Like right now

+==edit==+
15.33pm

No idea what time I finally fell asleep
Also only for e.a.r.l would I learn a new score pls hahahaha
Also happy it's the weekend
I usually stay home on weekends unless family drags me out because personally my inclination is to avoid crowd
But also work tomorrow but also I usually do all my work on Sunday night so monday doesnt feel bleagh aka I do work whenever I feel like it so I dont feel tied down by responsibilities
I wanna adventure more
Yesterday's cycling adventure made me feel quite accomplished
I just miss rehearsearls did I mention that probably only every other day
I lost my grandfather to covid and I have a granduncle who is now in the ICU because of covid and they were both in different nursing homes
If a slightly tighter restriction could reduce the community cases enough for people to not lose their lives every single day (which is not okay) then the only reason to not do so is ultimately selfishness
Im not spending my brain cells thinking about this it's frustrating trying to figure out people's (lack of) logic
I saw some videos recommended on fb about the ministers "answering" questions and I air quote answering because they did none of the answering
The textbook answers are so last year
But unlike many I dont need a "We were wrong" admission cause we all already know they are hahahaha
I'll probably edit this post to remove the whole rant about covid but im just lazy to think and im just typing the most present thoughts im having
Im hungry
Mama is cooking so yay
I need to edit at least 1 vlog and I will have 5gb more memory lol

01.16am

In true Me fashion, a night before an adventure is a sleepless one due to excitement
Hahaha I love that about myself lol please never change thanks
Also we might have learnt that Alfie is a leftie
Just a random fact lol

+==edit==+
02.53am

I might have to be up in 2, or else 3 hours
I hope not crowded bluek

+==edit==+
15.56pm

Officially settled down
Felt like I went on a holiday for 8 hours and then came back
Best things about mornings is that the day feels longer, aka more daytime and sunshine
However why do I always fail to sleep before embarking on physical activities
I have showered and am now diligently trying to finish a cup of iced water before hopefully sleeping or not honestly im not that tired lolz

Ps; i dont want to forget that;
Your family told us you loved flowers, atok.
You'd always put a lot in the coffins of those who passed before you did
Thankfully one of them managed to sneak in a few flowers with you before your body was sealed

+==edit==+
16.08pm

After all that sun I come back to cold
Not complaining either way ehehe
Ok fine I just came back from my very first time to Pulau Ubin!
I did too well

+==edit==+
23.37pm

Content managing my phone always makes me oof cause I keep vlogging but never edit
I have footage from hmx's first concert in 2018 still sitting begging to be edited
Lol

15.46pm

Why isit so cold
Finally got my specs and I thought it'd be a yay but my eyes got shocked at the HDness and it hurtz
Lol i'll need to train myself all over again

+==edit==+
18.32pm

The rollercoaster of emotions I went through the past 2 hours
Happy because e.a.r.l is finally starting on a new song
But I accidentally revisited heartbreak
No thanks to instagram's explore page which made me THINK and therefore FEEL
Im done

The post where I say the word annoy thrice lol (04.28am)

Did work for the past 2 hours
Had a lovely day yesterday, went to see baby fahri and mummy eatgo with chiqa this time round
Got a chic-a-boo feast and I managed to make fahri stop crying by singing Old mcdonalds, but I ran out of animals to include and I had to make chiqa quickly give me ideas while im singing
So yes in old macfahri's farm there's giraffes, bears and pandas
Had an annoying experience when going home though- the lift stopped at every floors possible (because the other one broke down so everyone was using that one lift) and what was supposed to be a 15 seconds journey from the house to the road became 5 minutes and thus I was charged the late fee for a grab ride we didnt even need to take because the vaccination centre we were rushing to was a no-go
Boy was I annoyed (also on this note usually I book ryde as it gives me less worry about rushing for the car but freakin heck they JUST introduced late fees too what a loser)
(Dont get me wrong im not one who makes drivers wait I only book when im ready but there are drivers who gives unecessary pressure when they say Arrived but they're nowhere to be seen and they cant be contacted- I HATE this with all my being)
But whatever la eh just thinking that maybe it's their rezeki soothes my fiery heart
Hahaha anyways I got a text that my specs are ready for collection!
Yayzers

ps why the heckie is this post not publishing are u trying to annoy me too blogger it's 4am give a girl a break

00.17am

Have been such a bad blogger but only because my days end so late and starts so early
Had such a lovely two days
Made specs finally hahahaha yup I still cant find my misplaced one and ended up buying the same frame again so hopefully it's ready for collection soonest
Today helped ele and her friends with their shoot which is so funny
Will update again with details
In the meanwhile,
Happy birthday along the apple!!! ♡

01.43am

My brain says Shampoo condition and clay mask tonight
My body says No thanks i dont feel like moving
Had a wonderful day today

+==edit==+
16.23pm

Me: claims she already knows when her period is coming because she get inexplicably exhausted
Also me: why have i been waking up so tired the past 3 days this makes no sense

01.02am

Oh oof
Had a lovely two days
Went to science centre yesterday from 10am (aka 11am cause of lateness) to 5pm, ate oxtail soup and satay, and watched dinosaurs in antarctica at the omnitheatre
I love science centre!!!!!!!
Today was supposed to be beach day with doya but we somehow (unsurprisingly) ended up getting out our score and piano for Somewhere over the rainbow and sang that one song and fixing notes instead of going out hahaahahaha such on brand characters
I missed singing, i missed qistileilamargobosko and just the whole house hahahaha aka rehearsearl ground
Happy 12th birthday chiqatito petite
This also means it's been 12 years since 2009 which makes no sense to me it has been 12 years since I started sec 1
Bluek

+==edit==+
02.47am

Why is instagram such an unreliable social media
One of my stories from June had been removed for going against guidelines, for "facilitate(ing) or organize(ing) activities that is likely to cause harm to others"
It is a screenshot of my supervisor asking me to go back to the office twice a week
Yes i agree it is harmful and yes it is quite funny but at the risk of my account being suspended??!!
I hate u instagram lol

+==edit==+
05.11am

Eyes so tired
But eyes also refuse to shut
So what u want me to do about it sista choose one can or not

03.58am

Should be asleep but cant even
I just watched flynn tell duncan "i dont touch spiders" three times and duncan says " i know" like a BIG BROTHER u are a baby duncan even though you have 2 younger brothers u are always baby in my eyes i love u n im not crying tears of awwness

21.36pm

Atok, to think that right now we no longer have your physical body in this realm is overwhelming.
I hope you're at peace now

I had a lovely day with yollie
We cycled, walked a lot as usual, ate and watched Venom (time passer, very noisy movie, forgettable but entertained me so I didnt mind it)
Thank god for sisterhood

Excited for tomorrow I have been so patient

03.13am

Actually slept the past almost 3 hours
Now I feel like eating samyang
I actually was having a good day yesterday
Finished work, went to sentosa to bring chiqa for luge and skyride
Our first time on the new, shorter heighted skyride and chiqa's first time on luge (aka she told me first round must go slowly cause her first time but she ended up zooming past me and winning the race)
We did 3 rounds! Somehow it was tiring having to complete everything within the hour even though we are seated on both the rides so idk where the tiredness comes from
Me the human who never bought attraction photos before bought it today since I told myself chiqo could get anything she wanted (it's her surviving PSLE gift)
Bummer that a lot of attractions are only open on friday and weekends so we couldnt do more
Then headed to vivo to meet mama for grocery shopping and ended up carrying so many plastic bags
Aka me saying how the family must be thankful I called chiqa Big show growing up cause now she's the strongest in the family (she carried 2x large detergent and cooking oil in 1 hand, non stop!!!)
Haha ok bye

+==edit==+
12.13pm

Just saw a message that mak ngah saw nenek crying
None of us ever saw nenek cry, ever.
This is heartbreaking

+==edit==+
19.22pm

Only good thing about funerals, the reunion of families. But no, i'd rather not
Thank Allah we're all placed in good health that we could come pay our last respects
I dont know if we'll be allowed to view atok but honestly I dont know if im capable of doing it

+==edit==+
22.48pm

If we could, we wouldve stayed there as long as possible- I really didnt want to leave so fast but the place was closing
Atok, the atmosphere was so lighthearted like it always has been with you around
I thought I wouldnt cry but seeing your photo was enough to break all our hearts
Your coffin was sealed because you were a covid patient, so we didnt get to see you except in photos
So many fond memories of you were shared by everyone, including how you always won in blackjack (well you also taught us how to cheat- hide the Ace card!)
How you would be annoyed when people are rowdy and loud, except if they were your grandkids (we have special privilege hehe, you tolerated our noise and we are NOISY)
We all have our regrets, most of which was how we failed to spend time with you more often the past few years.
You've always been the one taking care of others
Tonight we found out you have a younger brother who looks exactly like you! He's a lot shorter, though, but the face, especially with the mask on and side profile- it's like seeing you in front of us
We found out you were indeed getting better! And you had a few close calls but you kept fighting, for 23 days.
I'm so so happy you got to hear nenek's voice on the phone. Apparently, one of the video calls session last friday, nenek called your name and you teared up hearing her voice. I wonder if you were thinking about the family, whether we remember you
We wished we could be there for you
We know you miss us all as much as we miss you
I hope you felt our company and love tonight atok even though it was just for a few hours
You brought our families closer together
My heart will forever have a special place for you atok.
I love you, thank you for everything! ♡

+==edit==+
23.14pm

Happy 6th months old baby alfie D;
It's not ok that I only saw you three times ever

Dreadful. For my beloved grandfather (23.15pm)

The day switched from lovely to bitter with just a text message
My beloved grandpa has passed exactly 5 hours ago, and yes, it was the darned COVID.
I was at vivo, grocery shopping, didnt have time to process it, not even now,
Not for a while, I think.
But let me just pour out words that feels right.
The first thing I thought of when the news first broke that you were in ICU due to covid, and had 5% chance of survival, was I want to see you.
I wanted you to be surrounded by us who loves you but barely made time for you, especially the past 3 years when you had to move to a nursing home.
I wanted to see you cry tears of joy once again, seeing all your grandchildren (and this time round, one great grandson too)
I saw the photo of you in a casket- how unrecognizable you were.
How heartbreaking that the wound on your hand from the day you fell those years ago still looked fresh
Your transition from strong, lively fella to a weaker, helpless one felt like overnight.
1 fall was all it took to change the you we knew and loved our whole life
I saw your frustration over the loss of your independence when you stopped being able to do things for yourself
I know you were unhappy feeling helpless and being treated like you're incapable of anything
We've never seen you cry but that's the only thing you could do when the whole family surprised you on your birthday (honestly, probably the wrong birthday, but youve never corrected us)- you burst into tears of joy and enjoyed being fed cake by all of us
I love you, atok.
Thank you for being the kindest, most loving.
You cared for us and gave us the best memories growing up with your magic tricks (how we took so long to figure out your trick to remove your 2 front teeth is because of dentures)
Your expertise at card tricks!!!
I remember the first time I found out your full name, it was on a letter you got, and I remembered from that day on
I would always be the most excited whenever you and nenek came over to our house, because you both rarely go out anyways
We'd always drag you to along and anga's room and make you entertain our antics
How you doted on chiqa the most
Calling her terrible when she refuses to salam you and nenek when she was in her terrible twos phase
And playing along when she, in return, called you 'jellybird', her attempt at copying you
I still use that term today
You were always on the same seat directly in front of the tv, it has always felt empty since you moved out and it always feels wrong to see anyone but you occupy it (well, until nenek changed the sofas)
Rest in peace, atok, whatever faith you had, I saw it for myself how devout you were.
You've never left the home without your long prayers standing infront of the door
I have missed you for the past three years, and now forevermore.
Thank you for lending your sunshine to the family.
Now you get to be free and strong like you have always been.
We love you.
I wished we could be surrounding you and bid our farewells and show you our limitless loves.
You would have been the best great grandpa for all our kids, calling them terrible when they misbehave in that playful tone I still hear ringing in my head
I'll make sure mine knows about what a wonderful, kind soul you were.
Some deeds only we know and hold close to us.
Rest easy, our atok anton. ♡

Antonio Sebastian Joao
6th November 1945-12th October 2021

p.s. remember that one post where I shared having an existential crisis about atok's birthday, cause i've always remembered it being 6th november but his IC says 6th December? I hate to say I finally got my confirmation today, and it's because of his passing

p.p.s MAJOR PLOT TWIST. His birthday is 6th November, apparently the date on his IC was printed wrongly. Oh my. No wonder atok said we were right whenever we celebrated him in november

00.30am

Just spent the whole day being BORED and uneventful I have no friends lol even if I do they are all occupied with their own things so means I dont have friends anyway

+==edit==+
11.18am

Fell asleep an hour before my bedtime and woke up 2 hours earlier than usual
May today be a better day I will make it so

03.43am

At this point my fav vloggers are simply pampering us with baby content
Leah, Luke, Duncan, Teddy, Flynn
Im happy everytime they post

+==edit==+
04.28am

Miss hmx
Miss e.a.r.l

+==edit==+
13.55pm

My bedtime has been I say 7am-1pm but it's more like Almost 8am-Almost 2pm wew hehe but it cool i guess

01.52am

My current contact lenses (moondust series from freshkon) is so comfy i almost went to sleep twice wearing it
Usually when I wind down or lie down to use my phone, I always remove my contacts first
But twice I caught myself halfway using phone and was like Wait are my contacts in then I look around the room and realise it's HD
Hahahaha ok good I guess
I ate more eggplant today than I have my whole life so thats cool I guess
Excited for self created adventures

20.20pm

Yes, being heartless is sometimes useful

09.10am

00.24am

Call it being at peace, I have been feeling light and airy the past few days
I feel like light, like I radiate life
I feel unstoppable and unbothered,
Content and happy.
This is a beautiful pause in my soul before I pursue more things that makes me feel
I love this feeling, and I hope it comes visit more often
But I also know I have to keep leaving it in order for it to keep finding me

Also I just woke up from an almost 2 hours nap
Wow tis the new sleep schedule I guess and also im hungry faster (even though i still end up eating only dinner like I ignore my hunger out of pure laziness) so new eating schedule too

+==edit==+
16.47pm

So done with singapore's way of handling covid currently
And no I dont have solutions there's a reason im not a person in charge

09.20am

Im surprised im up already considering WHAT TIME my body let me fall asleep
I miss hmx

+==edit==+
17.33pm

In 2 days I saw 2 9 year old looking children jogging around the neighbourhood alone
What discipline what lifestyle I applaud

+==edit==+
19.19pm

Going out with mama means my hands AND legs pain
Hands cus i just carried 2 coconuts ouchie
Legs cus she walks SO FAST
Go back crash

05.39am

Whatsapp down is obviously problematic cause main source of communication
Fb down is terrible cause 2nd main source of phonentertainment (youtube is first)
Insta down is bad just because i usually visual blog there
All in all, fIx yOselF!!! I miss fb already

+==edit==+
23.35pm

I miss science centre

02.51am

Hearing Matahariku on the radio makes me miss karaoke places
Fever is reduced and I slept for the past almost 4 hours
Thinking about how i'd have to go out for wifi later today which I have been able to avoid
Dont even feel like being in public eugh but maybe I could just find a secluded area in life and do work quickly and leave

+==edit==+
11.17am

A miracle!
Woke up with fixed wifi
:')

+==edit==+
13.27am

Anyways my vertigo is 98% gone!
I only feel the lightheadedness when sudden movements or like very specific positions
Cant wait till it's 110% gone and I can do gymnastics again (ive never done gymnastics)

03.29am

Eugh I am so uncomfortable
Hot and cold like the air is chilly but also humid and my body doesnt know which side to accept
Wifi is still down zz and 4g depletes my battery and makes my phone hot bleh
Watching colleen and judy's vlogs to cheer myself up and they work of course
Now if only the Ballingers would post too hehehee

+==edit==+
03.49am

Guess what youtube notification I just got 2 mins ago
Ballingers uploaded a new vlog
:')
I am happiness
(despite having to switch the fan on and off and putting on a blanket and taking it off three thousand times)

+==edit==+
04.04am

If that wasnt the cutest most precious vlog T.T
Thks now I feel empty again hehahaha ok drama
Luke is doing so good and I love seeing him love his Teddy
Also dont get me wrong im probably tired and able to fall asleep any second if I were comfortable at all

08.09am

Yeah this new agenda is incompatible with current sleep schedule
Gotta be somewhere by 9 but I only fell asleep 2 hours ago but I was sleeping well and even woke up before my alarm
It is freezing cold and i'll be in aircon for 5 hours
How even but it's okay let's keep an open mind

+==edit==+
19.22pm

Cant even say im exhausted cause social interaction wakes me up
But i am exhausted
Fever from being in cold places the whole day
My feet hurt and wrist tired, soul drained from being someone i'm not
But I survived
Now I can lepak

Merry October (05.56am)

I am ready to try and fall asleep
But I have work to do
Aka why havent I done it yet
Im just gonna quickly do it and go to bed but zzzz

+==edit==+
08.28am

Lol feels like the past few blogs were just me complaining
One more complain can
My eyes are so DRY
I be doing work the past 2 hours like Just a bit more before I can rest you
But lol I got a bit more work to catch up on for today i'll really have to go out to get wifi it eats up my 4g quite a bit so that is not sustainable
But for now im tired and hot and cold and the weather just doesnt work well with my body idk how many times I have switched my fan off and on

06.28am

The weather being hot and cold is making my body confused and thus im just all around uncomfortable
Eek

+==edit==+
19.17pm

Wifi has been down for 2 days now hello singtel
And conveniently I have a work deadline by tonight
So like what am I supposed to be a venturer and go out for wifi
I'd use my hotspot but circles is not reliable too
Pffft

+==edit==+
22.01pm

I have no strength to move and sit in a cafe to do work
But soon it'd be 2am and I wont have a choice

06.56am

Hi I did work for the past hour
But like of course when I have the mood the software lags and my contacts becomes super dry
I wanted to continue but suddenly best thing ever the file wouldnt even open
Not even loading, mind you
It just does nothing
I double click I open with nothing happens
So okay I did all I could for now lolol

+==edit==+
18.14pm

Super first world problem but today whole day wifi is down, and now suddenly my 4g decides that not working is the cool thing to do now
So like. What the heck which planet is doing renegade

08.31am

What time did I even sleep probably a bit before 4
Also does this mean im back to being a morning bird but also night owl cus I still cant sleep at night

+==edit==+
15.38pm

Lol sis kept napping
I feel like I want cookies or browniez
Why so rainy

09.37am

Got woken up by so many things the past 3 hours that when my alarm rang, I texted mama saying Hello excuse me im awake as if she's spam calling me to wake up
Lolol then I realised noone texted or called it was my alarm (and i unsent that message hahahahha)
But for real sis just fell asleep and an hour later, body clock woke me up
2 hours later, humans talking to me
3 hours later, A PHONE VIBRATING in the living room- im sorry i thought vibrate mode is supposed to be quieter so HOW DID THAT WAKE ME UP
And then 4 hours later, a spam call that I just straight up rejected but like What the actual heck, a spam call at 8 freaking am???? What is WRONG with you and WHO sold my phone number to these spam companies im gonna find u and chop ur fingers off
And now, my alarm rang
Can u see how unpeaceful my rest was.
Whatevs
I have lunch plans but if I fall asleep again due to exhaustion i give up

23.30pm

Freakin blogger making my post disappear

Had a lazy sunday before deciding to go out after dinner
Now content and ready to face the new week

02.10am

Had such a fun day!
Went science centre again and didnt manage to see all again- 3 hours is NOT it!!!
Which just means... go again hehehehee noone is complaining
Ate desserts delicious and then played pandemic for 3 hours before walking in the silent town and heading home
I should rightfully be exhausted and sleep but noPe I have so much energy

06.18am

Is it cause I put pressure on myself to get sufficient and good rest tonight so my body is like Haha how about No
Cus why am i awakeeeee i have activity in 8 hours

16.53pm

Right after I finished watching Azkaban last night I opened FB to see the release date announcement for FB3 the title gave me goosebumps!!!!! Secrets of dumbledore r u kidding and IT'S COMING OUT SOONER THAN EXPECTED im the most ready but also waittt but also faster
Hahahha kay
Had a lovely day yesterday, it was so sunny but malls are so cold so my body is confused
Ate delicious nasi padang (although it was 9$ which i still shook by but i have learnt to expect the worst) and ice cream which is ALWAYS YUMMY (i still want netflix n chilld b&j you did really well there also thank you for making it one of the halal flavours I luv u)
And then I wanted to have adventures but period exhaustion hits different like I didnt have strength to stand or walk much hahahaha like can la but why would I
THEN watched POA and napped so much
Chiqatito's PSLE is next week im so shook

01.16am

Here to hate on post credits scene
Just end it proper
Annoying

+==edit==+
16.52pm

UGH I miss rehearsearl this is not okAY that we're not meeting weekly im angry

11.27am

Everyone ever who meets me for the first time especially if we liaised over whatsapp first; you like undertaker ah
Imagine if I was like "Who?"
Hahahaha but yes for the record I am him thks

04.59am

Yes, why in the heckity am I awake
Litrally woke up at 6.40am alarmless on a sunday yesterday but of course im still awake at 5am the day I have to head into the office it's like my body is rebelling against mySELF
Worst part is I actually have a long day ahead
No choice but to hope I get to nap at least for the next 2 hours or so, and rely on extrovertness to wake myself up
Bleh

+==edit==+
07.09am

Got an hour sleep even though I could afford 2
My body woke up fresh as if it slept 4 hours
U better dont turn on me in the office later and speaking of office,
Why the heckie is WFH not a default yet again
Even if govt doesnt mandate why cant companies be brighter

+==edit==+
12.02pm

No joke the only thing that can keep me mildly awake is listening to mj12 cus adrenaline makes my heart pump blood to my brain I guess
But literally by my side I have been shuffling between taking sips of coffee, reapplying eye drops, face mist, and mentos
Now I have resorted to writing backwards for no reason but hahahaha yea only mj12 is working
Got a new job scope today- tedious excel documents but I honestly think im kinda done? But like I dont want to be too sure so i'll just give myself till the end of the day muahaha
Ok in 26 mins I can take an hour nap
Also it's super cold ugh ew

+==edit==+
18.32pm

Survived the first half of my day.....
Thought I could get an hour nap before embarking on nighttime agenda but you guessed it once my head hits the pillow it wants nothing to do with sleep or rest but now that I have to get up and get ready suddenly tiredness is spreading all over my body
Ridiculous hahaha
But ok I shall minimize my get ready time and let my physical being rest a tad more
May tonight's stuff go okay and just cause im exhausted- not last that long heh
Also im no longer friendly extrovert so we'll see how that goes

+==edit==+
23.52pm

Ex
Haus
Ted
!!!
But I survived
Yet another journey of life caused by a Yolo jump dont think moment is upcoming
You know how much I love capturing moments, via words, photos and videos
But ive never done them with professional equipment so thats like a thing I needa get through loL
Watch me be best photographer using bad cameras
Ok i'll share more tomorrow
I survived a long day and I shall crash and hopefully be a morning bird tomorrow
Here's to a beautiful day ahead

00.40am

Had a beautiful 2 days!
I finally, finally went to... SCIENCE CENTRE yesterday!!!!!!!
But but the best part is, we couldnt finish even 2 out of the many exhibitions!!!
Why best part?
Cause it means GO AGAIN!!!@@@!!!!!
We spent 1.5 hours in the Da vinci exhibition where we learnt and saw in person the masterpieces I invented (yes im da vinci shh secret)
(Also Hello science centre 3 hours of visit is not enough pls bring back whole day operating hours soon thankz)
The weather was so beautiful and it wasnt crowded so it was amazing heheehe I had tons of FUN but not enough yet so wait for us science centre!!!!!

Today, met yol for "bowling" but while waiting for the 1hr+ waiting time we watched shang chi (aka kung fu panda called, they want their movie back HAHAHAH) and then zoomed to play board game! (Singular cus we could only play 1- pandemic)
It was super hilarious cus the last time I played was years ago with hmx so in our first round we were secretly like why so easy (in my head i was like i remember this being more fun and challenging) then we realised we shortcut SO MANY things hahahaha we make ourselves laugh
Then after beating the board once on the beginner stage, we went straight to hero stage and we died twice very quickly cus dk why the epidemic cards were so close together lolol
We had lots of fun also and so funny that suddenly yol revealed it's actually my birthday outing ahaha

Alhamdulillah for the very enjoyable weekend (friday is weekend also la okey), here's to a restful Sunday ahead and then back to work on Mondayzzz
(Notice the zzz)
Hahaha ok bye