Salam Aidilfitri! (03.28am)

Me in 6 hours would hate current me for NOT BEING ASLEEP

14.53pm

Aidilfitri; returning and celebrating a pure state of being after the holy month

We are the most blessed and I hope we never take it for granted

The heart never lies

You can feel it

09.08am

Dont even know how much I slept last night, like 2 hours again or 3 hours 

Lolol 

Had an impromptu day yesterday

Planned to go out by myself but god surrounded me with loved ones

Also got to try shoes ive been eyeing for years

I would have bought it if not for the troublesome hook

I have a PHD in raya heels and hooks are not it 

No matter how... gorgeous and comfortable they are (crieS)

13.01pm

Why do I keep NOT sleeping

Sis

I just got ready cause I know I wanna go out today but

I realise I slept barely 2 hours for no reason except refusal and lack of desire

Had a really silly rehearsearl last night hahaha we literally scheduled it to finish a song but we ended up doing so much nonsense but to be fair it was mcdonald's fault for making us wait extra long for food (cause their system cleared and our orders disappeared) 

But anyways

My body is awake and fresh I literally already have blusher and lipoil on I just got ready just to go back into my pjs 

Cause my eyes hunty, are so tired, as it should be 

Zzz

Today is no rush day anyway I answer to noone but myself

04.57am

I have been pulling all nighters for the third night today and so funny cause when nearing sahur time then im like wow im so fresh but it's just I havent slept

Btw why do smartphones and social media and everything good like to DOWNGRADE with their every update 

Nonsense

+==edit==+

06.52am

I SHOULD SLEEP

AT LEAST GET A POWER NAP

But im not sleepy at all

But I have a really long day ahead

Yes it is fun but still long day

Ok sleep my alarm will ring in like less than 2 hours

+==edit==+

15.32pm

We dont always need a reason for doing things

Oftentimes it's enough to just do because you feel like it

Im blogging now but im literally walking toward seeing my baby yayan!!!

Like literally going up the stairs to him now 

My heart is exploding of excitement to see that little face

17.51pm

No joke I am DEEPLY YEARNING to go to vivo (aka I have this feeling once every few months)

So funny I literally just went there after choir like last tuesday but it was just a quick dip into ntuc for sushi

Also last friday I brought myself out to nowhere in what felt like forever, (it felt SO nice just taking the first bus that comes and knowing I had no obligations except do what I want) and ended up at Esplanade library

Picked up a book about Queen (the band not the woman) (pronounced woo-Men cause rhymes) and managed to read 100 pages before buka time and eventually rehearsal

I feel super in holiday mode- I think after pretty much non-stop hustling the past 2 months and then the intense disney training and a few shoots at the start of April, suddenly I get a break and it feels equally weird and much needed

I get to embrace the rest of ramadan and prepare for raya in my own pace

Of course, ready to go back hustling after the first few days of raya I guess but for now, I am content and thankful 

Alfie is 2 :')

I miss yayarn and fahri 

19.54pm

I thank you for your guidance,

Clear as day

07.58am

Maybe God made us different so I can absorb pain on our behalf

Keep me steady, make me the bigger person who will always choose love over ego

If anything, i'll get more pain upfront but no regrets later

Remind myself you're hurting, somewhere, something, and you are unable to express it 

Remind myself that the cure to these strong feelings is love and light

Pain cannot cancel each other out

If I can choose how to react, so shall I

Had a mini raya shoot last night which meant I got to wear baju kurung and play bunga api

Had a lonely boring night but today is all up to me

I miss Vivo and Sentosa so I might do something about it

Let me check the weather forecast (pls be good) 

Have a wonderful day

+==edit==+

08.10am

Ok I just rewatched the bratz movie after so long and wow for a movie I can almost memorize, I felt new feelings

So... nostalgic, in a could've been way

I thought my life would turn out that way but sis we're so far off

Issok, all will be well 

23.22pm

Im not sad but

My heart is sad

23.49pm

Did a few new things today, including an audition, and only managing to break my fast at 7.46pm

(Not good)

I miss sentosa/vivo so much that I was at redhill and felt happy that I was so near sentosa

Hahahaha I will visit you soon i miss u 

08.11am

Slept so long and woke up so tired I kept sleeping again

Should really get up now

+==edit==+

22.47pm

Listening to Scream on my walk back from the bus stop and I CANT STAND STILL

Oh wow the song ended right as I reached my front door hehehe meant to be

I love hsm la 

Also had a choir session just now wow 

18.28pm

Im a being who would always happily remove herself from situations I refuse to be in, regardless of consequences (cause yolo i do what makes me happy duh)

But times like these I push through and im like I'm Resillient?! I'm actually John Cena

Survived 4/5 days of training- quite bittersweet but mostly sweet cause no joke, I get dehydrated everyday

So many moments I wanted to tap out but I somehow didnt wtheck how even

Hahaha but

Alhamdulillah, better than staying home doing nothing

One. More. Day to push through

I'll try to embrace the day no matter how exhausted and dizzy I get 

Maybe i'll even talk to people

Hahahahah

Merry April (05.38pm)

I want to sleep but

Reyrey will be inducted in the HOF in a few hours

I still cant believe it

I should try and nap god knows I need it