20 Years of Cenation (04.01am)

I cried watching his return to RAW speech

I think the part when he said he gives his all every single time in the ring cause the audience always gives our all 

And it's so true

To see how he has grown as a man, from that arrogant boy in tights and then wannabe rapper to an actual superhero

I swear WWE raised me in a way, too

The values literally Never give up, Hustle loyalty respect is ingrained in me 

Sometimes I feel weak and i'll think to myself Will John Cena feel this?!? And it immediately pushes me to push myself

I always tell people I dont like watching superhero movies, and I 1000% know it's cause I grew up watching real life superheroes

When there's someone out there who dares to whisper "Cena Sucks", I have an army behind me ready to scream "LETS GO CENA" hehehee ok u all will never understand this is true love

He looks so small and so much older than I remembered

As long as he is happy, healthy and thriving

Hehee ok 

00.43am

Btw macs banana pie nice 10/10 want again

Bring back white choco strawberry

+==edit==+

16.42pm

U know the meme that goes

Aku kerja keras kerna aku sadar aku gak punya tuyul

(Wait omg im literally listening to mj12 and i think it's a TOYOL STORY NOW??? HAHAHA SHIZ OK IT IS OMG WTH)

ok back to my point

Im tripped wew

For me is aku kerja keras kerna aku mau youtube premium 

Lolol k bye eekk no toyols pls my heart is beating fast

23.45pm

Dont know what I did to be blessed with your rezeki, alhamdulillah

Had a lovely weekend I think I dont even remember what I did

Oh yes watched mat kilau and then rehearsearl on sunday

Made a silly video and drank iced coffee

Ate macs and accidentally had a heart to heart talk that meant last buses

Getting back in touch with bestoe was the best thing to happen

We've both wondered where each other went while we were right there

I guess every relationship needs the refreshing

Ate one meal today and didnt move from bed until when I ate

So much to do but today apparently was not the day to do things

Hopefully I dont fall asleep at 7am and I wake up at that time instead so I can do things

Excited at the prospect of mornings but you have no idea how night owl ive been literally since I stopped my office job 

Have been thinking of hiking again so maybe if I manage to fall asleep tonight i'll go for one tomorrow

Good idea

00.29am

Literally just watched the Mat kilau movie

10/10 better than avengers lol 

Adi putra is a yes since na o mei days

+==edit==+

10.34am

The word Lavender is very nice until I have to spell it out myself

It's like existence 

The vagueness of a/e sounds is more disturbing than I ever gave thought to

+==edit==+

11.05am

Rule followers are ok until they try to make ME follow the rules then i dont like you peasant

+==edit==+

12.38pm

Sometimes I wonder what grab and gojek drivers' gps tell them cause it's so annoying how OFF they are (and most annoying when they self declared arrived and I dont even see their car) 

05.14am

Even if you left me in a windowless room with no sense of time the only rest i'll get is a 2 hour afternoon nap

Ive been exhausted waking up lately, which knowing my body means im transitioning to fresh body clock tendencies

I wonder if i'll be a morning bird again anytime soon 

But no matter, I enjoy and do not have any qualms about being a night owl- any issue is with people who plans morning things hahaha not that i'll be tired I think i'm more tired about thinking about how tired I could be 

Wow

Okay

Had a much needed catch up with bestoe and ended the night eating durian at 2am so you could say we are like pods in a pea woww not poetic hahaha

Hi universe,

Grant me patience, grant the people who care about me patience

Thank you for the strong faith you've instilled in me, all I can do is believe in the inner voice inside me and I freefall into trusting your guidance

23.59pm

Just trying to blog before midnight in attempts of not seeming like i missed yet another day 

Lol

12.34pm

Just did 2 hours of talking to strangers

Quite fun and even got coffee

But also my sleep schedule means instead of seizing the rest of the day im quickly returning to comfort

Gonna drink iced coffee, maybe eat if im not too lazy and then lie down for awhile before doing some chores

+==edit==+

18.54pm

I actually do keep trying

Ive cut off people but I also only see their good 

And I know when it's too much and it's time, i'll let go like sand between my fingers

22.10pm

Currently lying down by the beach and there are so many stars in the sky

Randomly tried to download instagram last night and it worked!!!

Need to remind myself that I can go back to visual blogging

17.43pm

I dont go around wanting oreos but once I start I kinda cant stop lol 

Especially when dipped in coffee 

Or those tiny bite sized ones

Ok bye 

+==edit==+

20.51pm

Did I not mention I cried watching Sharpay's fabulous adventure cause it's me right now

Except all the disguspinkness change it all to purple and change boi to a kitty cat 

Sharpay raised me hahahaha

01.06am

I just lost track of time

Things were going really well, I had a big project to look forward to, I was happy and at ease

When it rain it pours sometimes

Right now it's pouring season

But hey, there has never been a setback we never managed to bounce back from

Was having quite a lovely day until the 180 mood change (ok fine, not 180, maybe 100°) 

I just need rest and sunshine 

I'll be back to face the world soon enough

+==edit==+

20.13pm

Already feel better after a day of rest

When did I become wEAK lol jk 

Anyway I need to try cheese fondue

Where can I find it

I am very aware that I can make my own cheese sauce for dipping but like cmon 

Appear in front of me 

04.04am

Rehearsearl in 7 hours and I just finished helping wobbly wona learn her parts when she had... 3 weeks to learn it

7 hours feel so far but I have a long day ahead

Rehearsearl, a wedding and then a less fun rehearsal

Which means I have to (read: want to) make up at 9am eek let me wash my brushes before I fall asleep 

I type that but idek if i'll do it hahahaha

+==edit==+

08.56am

Me: trying to give my body as much rest as possible

My body: wakes up every 20 MINUTES 

Wew that was rough

Oh well

I shall get up for real

+==edit==+

22.53pm

Had a long day

My body heard my dread and gave me a pass out

The exhaustion and heaviness I felt in the afternoon was so sudden and wew 

My period just came today

But alhamdulillah im an extrovert and seeing love all around made me energetic again

Now my eyes are tired

17.10pm

I am just happy to see people happy

Meanwhile im manifesting beach days for myself

The more sun sand and sea, the happier i'll be

Poetry 

Also I just got a message ive used 100% of my data but amazingly it literally renews this midnight

Feel like writing a song

Wished I still had my keyboard my mama gave it away a few years ago

Im having iced coffee and staying zen

I am untouchable

Went to the library yesterday and read parenting books and I am happy to report I learnt nothing new

You know why 

Well besides my own family's teachings-

All them family vlogs ive been watching

Ballingers and judy teaching me western parenthood which I actually like most of their techniques

No im not going to be a parent anytime soon but I am an aunt of many so I must be prepared 

Also had a walk around my old neighbourhood feeling very fond and happy to be there

Of course it feels both homey and foreign but I love the energy there it's so peaceful and cooling

I sat at an empty badminton court recalling what we used to do 

Ended the day with fried fish soup and then belting defying gravity at 1am

It was a really lovely day

Ive actually been dreading theatre rehearsals a bit, just cause my role is so heavy and im newly back into it so it takes much more of me than I was willing to give (lolol it's like new child of mine who this)

Im sure it'd all be fine- only 2 more rehearsals and then 2 full dresses and bump in before the actual show

Now that I think about it I am being underpaid.... lol but it's ok, first theatre gig and im grateful and excited for the opportunity

But for once I would like to just skip to the actual performance, usually I embrace rehearsals and would not want actual day to come so fast but meh

I thought like oh maybe I dont love theatre as much as I thought- but honestly though I think it's just not comfortable with the people im working with

Give me a role in Hmx the musical and i'll live inside the rehearsal venue

I scheduled an awwcappella rehearsal next week and im looking forward to that more even though that's not the new thing in my life lolzers

Ok my iced coffee is almost done which is always sad

I got a script to memorize but im major procrastinating it, i'll do it tomorrow

Okay bye haha

04.55am

Me still making morning plans despite falling asleep at 7am is actually a safer bet than noon plans cause that is most likely my naptime but if we interrupt it by doing something then I won't need the rest 

So it's mostly whether the people I made plans with follows through with the morningness

21.06pm

Why am I a being who misses blogging for no good reason

The most honest and accurate answer I can give is I lost track of time and day hahaha this is what happens once you no longer adhere to working days and hours

Which I really truly do love

I love feeling unstoppable everyday and not anticipating fridays

K nice bye 

23.04pm

After a week of harmonix concert doing, back to my rehearsals

Tired zz also valid reason to not go back early hahaha

02.07am

Oh did I have a lovely evening by the beach

It was empty and the view was too beautiful and it was windy

Me and titi held a busking session for our shadows (we asked them to paynow us their tips) 

Anyway im clearing my phone memory cause I wanna vlog hmx's concert bts

And me in every vlog: Hi good morning, it's (insert time that ranges from morning to night)

Lolol 

Also im so happy I vlog things that seemed insignificant cause now looking back at them im like Wew im glad I captured how I felt then, it was cool

Naise

Ok back to content managing

+==edit==+

03.17am

Tokti just stop it eh with her amazingness i CRY

Come concert in sg please i need your aura 

Merry June (07.40am)

My body clock is just the best right now but the lack of things to do makes it seem like a whyyyy

Im sleeping like 1-3 hours and then once I wake up and try to sleep back i'll just wake up 20 minutes later again

Maybe it's time to go tire myself out